Hello and happy Monday! I’m all for a new week and new adventures, but don’t you kind of hate it when the weekend ends? Why can’t we have five days of weekend and two days of working? Or even zero days of working? I think I just described one of the seven deadly sins. Though out of the whole bunch I think sloth is the least sinful. Not that those kinds of opinions are up to me. Good Lord shut up self, SHUT UP.
This weekend was one of the blink-and-you-missed-it variety. Wonderful, but jam-packed and much too short. Since I’m sure you’ve been waiting with bated breath to hear what I’ve been up to, it would be rather rude of me to keep the details of my oh-so-exciting weekend to myself, wouldn’t it? Yes, it would be very rude indeed.
First of all let me take a moment to admit that my sleepy, Monday-morning fingers just typed that “Frideay.” Clearly it’s time for my fourth cup of coffee. Anyway, Andy had had a hard day at work so I wanted to bust out my culinary skills and cook him a nice dinner. A generous, wifely, fool-proof plan, or so one would think. Assuming one had any culinary skills whatsoever. Turns out the scallops that Ina Garten instructed me to “lightly” dredge in flour before pan searing did not in fact appreciate being lightly dredged in said flour, and chose to make my life astoundingly difficult in consequence. We ended up with mushy, disgusting scallops and a rice pilaf that tasted like cardboard. Oh, but the salad wasn’t too bad. The wine was better.
Sorry Andy. It’s the thought that counts?
I spent Saturday morning cooking breakfast tacos and reading through the rough draft of my book, jotting down beginning revision notes. This could just be the delicious breakfast tacos speaking, but it turns out the manuscript isn’t as bad as I thought! There are some really good, solid chunks in there so far. Of course you are always your own worst critic so I was pretty sure it was going to be an atrocity against the English language, but it didn’t suck too hard. How’s that for self confidence?
And then Faith sent me this picture and obviously I had to share it with the internet.
I spent my Saturday evening at a murder mystery dinner party with my mom, Aunt Linda and a bunch of their teacher friends. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. So apparently there are these murder mystery kits you can purchase online, and they include character descriptions for all your guests, and a complete outline of the [fake...no one get their panties in a wad, please] murder, clues, the whole shebang. My character was named Olivia and she owned the upscale spa at which the heinous crime took place. She also had a shady past as a go-between for international jewel thieves and their American distributors. I wasn’t the murderer in the end [dang it], but the dinner part of the evening included tacos and also there was more wine so I’m still calling it a win.
Sunday I went to….wait for it…..a GROWN UP TEA PARTY. Yes, it was every bit as fantastic as you would imagine. We ate quiche and scones and tea sandwiches and biscuits and drank hot tea and mimosas. Basically the party was everything that is right in this world.
Wow, you are probably thinking. What a busy weekend she had. But wait, there’s more! [I've always wanted to say that, did I pull it off well?] My weekend concluded with great seats at a Straight No Chaser concert. If you don’t know who Straight No Chaser is because you have a life, allow me to explain. They are a men’s a cappella group that began when they were in college [as a cappella groups are wont to do, including the one I was in] and they became YouTube famous with their incredible and hilarious arrangement of the 12 Days of Christmas. Cue overnight superstardom….well, as “super” as a cappella stardom can really be, at least. They’re fantastic, and I could rave for hours about the concert. So effing good.
And their concert t-shirts benefit(t?)ed music education, so obviously I had to buy five. Just kidding. Probably.
Now if you’ll excuse me I’m off to chase down that fourth cup of coffee. Happy Monday!
—The Wife in Training