This weekend I hit 20k words on my manuscript and I am so freaking excited. That’s like…almost halfway through a decent initial draft. I AM ALMOST HALFWAY AN AUTHOR YOU GUYS.

Key word: almost.

Recently I stumbled across this hashtag on twitter: #amwriting. People use it to denote that they are in fact…writing. You’re shocked, I know. But it got me thinking. Yesterday I dedicated most of my waking 17ish hours to “writing.” That being said, I certainly did more than write words during those hours. So today I’ve compiled a list of the things one might do when one is technically “writing.”

Remembering your cousin nominated you for the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge
Dreading dumping a bucket of ice cold water on your head
Considering the idea that $100 really isn’t all that many dollars to donate
Realizing you could buy 100 tacos for that, and instantly dismissing the idea
Reprimanding yourself for being selfish, and reminding yourself it’s for charity
Writing in hopes that if you forget about the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, maybe your cousin will, too
Completing the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge
Writing while wet (not ideal)
Snuggling with your cats
Drinking coffee…and Diet Coke…and water…and Diet Coke again…and wine
Peeing eleven gajillion times from all the aforementioned drinking
Picking at your nail polish
Thinking about all the ways your book sucks
Realizing that is poisonous, negative thinking
Telling those poisonous, negative thoughts to get the eff out
Writing again
Microwaving popcorn and then rewarding yourself with a mouthful at the end of every new paragraph
Wondering what you’ve got in the fridge for dinner
Remembering, “Oh yeah, hot dogs”
Craving hot dogs
Being mad at yourself for blowing off that whole exercise thing…again
Writing more words
Pouring a healthy glass of pinot grigio
Writing some more
Wondering what time the VMAs start
Debating whether your mom will get mad if you put a sex scene in your book
Looking up tattoo designs
Remembering that your husband doesn’t want you to get a tattoo
Writing even more
Finally hitting your word count and then laying down on the couch like a living, breathing blob during the VMAs
Telling yourself you could have, should have, written more

—The Wife in Training


  • Reply August 25, 2014

    Kathleen Barrett

    You can’t forget reading other people’s blog while you are supposed to be writing (or for me, working) :)

  • Reply August 25, 2014


    This is extremely accurate. I’m so proud of you for writing ALLLLLLL of those words! That’s a really big deal and I feel like you definitely deserved that healthy glass of PG. Also i want to read your book right now. NOW.

  • Reply August 25, 2014


    I insist on a steamy scene in your book!! What else will people talk about in their blogger book clubs if there’s not a little raunch?


    And yes. Sex scene please. And also HAPPY HOUR.

  • Reply August 25, 2014

    chelsea jacobs

    Yay! So exciting!!

  • YUP, this all sounds about right!!

  • Reply August 26, 2014


    I kinda remember a text conversation about how you were gonna let us read your book. A) It isn’t in your little recap list up there… and B) I HAVEN’T READ THE BOOK YET. So like where is the book? I wanna read the book… (when I say book, I mean manuscript #notawriterbutsojealousthatyouare

  • Reply August 31, 2014

    Rachel G

    As a fellow writer–this very much made me laugh. Writing can sure involve any number of other activities along the way, while the fingers move more or less slowly across the keyboard…

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